Mark Andrews – I’m considerably poorer than you, Rishi, an energetic call, and why Wolves can’t win when it comes to ticket prices

Why do people – and PR types in particular – feel it necessary to torture our language in this way? The word is ‘give’.

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Our condolences to Rishi Sunak, who ‘famously’ had to do without Sky television during his youth. Well, at the risk of sounding a bit ‘Four Yorkshiremen’, I don’t have Sky TV now either. Never did. And neither does Netflix. I didn’t eat a Pret sandwich either.

But you never miss what you never have. And I’d have a great sob story if I ever went on X Factor.

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What Mr Sunak should have said, of course, was: ‘We didn’t really need that much, but we weren’t rich either. My parents were just ordinary people, who worked long hours to give us the best start in life, who prioritized giving us a good education on luxuries like satellite TV.”

If he had said that, he would have received a much more sympathetic audience from the millions of ordinary, ambitious working people who face similar dilemmas.

You might not think it from the standard of political discourse these days, but not everyone is a class warrior.

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While writing this column I had a very strange telephone conversation with ‘Chris from the Energy Advice Center’, who started the conversation by talking at length about ‘Het Pand’.

“What property,” I asked, when he finally caught his breath. Not an unreasonable question, considering he had called a work number.

“That’s great, I’m talking to the right person,” Chris replied, gleefully waxing lyrical about the joys of loft insulation.

My attempt to explain to Chris that he had called the editor of a newspaper – and that attic insulation was not really my area of ​​expertise – also did not faze him.

Chris: “Do you have a traditional attic space?”

Me: “I don’t know, I operate out of an office on the eighth floor, there’s another floor above and then there’s a roof covered with satellite dishes to feed the computer network.”

Chris: “That’s great. Can I just ask: are you between 40 and 85 years old?”

I’m wondering what qualifications you need to work for the Energy Advice Centre. Except that you are a good listener, of course.

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Now that the dust has settled in the row over the eye-watering price increases for Wolves season tickets, I’m going to put on my (burgundy) tin hat and stick my head above the parapet.

Of course, it’s asking a lot from fans to implement massive price increases amid a cost-of-living crisis, but the club finds itself in a no-profit situation.

Wolves did remarkably well, finishing as high as last season after being forced to sell their star players. If they make a stuttering start to next season and end up on the wrong side of the table at Christmas, how long will it be before the same fans demand the chairman splash the cash?

It’s just like politics. Everyone wants the government to spend more money on this, that and the other. Just not their money.